120 private links
http://acidezmental.xpg.uol.com.br/nomes_de_pobre.html
Dez critérios utilizados pelo pobre na hora de batizar o filho
1 – Combinações. Geralmente pega-se o nome de pai, avô e mãe. Fica uma coisa mais ou menos assim: Claudemarioneide.
2 – Geografia. De Uáchinton a Sidiney, o Mapa Mundi é um celeiro de inspirações.
3 – Show business. Os nomes mais populares do cinema e da música, reunidos numa única certidão de nascimento: Maicow Jéquisson Chuarzineguer Disney dos Santos.
4 – Nomes compostos. O pobre sempre sofreu com a falta de recursos. Portanto, acha que aumentando o número de nomes pode dar uma vida mais feliz ao filho. Caso de Jeniffer Luiza Raquel Caroline Oliveira da Silva, 31 anos, diarista.
5 – Y. Tem Y no nome, é 85% de chances de ser pobre.
6 – Homenagens. De remédio a atacante do Flamengo: pobre adora uma homenagenzinha.
7 – Marcas. Eu mesmo já falei com um Philips e outro das antigas chamado Syncachambor.
8 – Eventos. O pobre não pôde ter vivido algo marcante na sua vida que já quer compartilhar com o filho. Exemplo: Udistoque, Rarley (o cometa) e o pior de todos: Tsunami.
9 – Confusões. Isso explica um conhecido, que se chama Pracedino. No dia, o tabelião perguntou: “Qual o nome”, ao passo que o pai respondeu: “Óia, é pra cê Dino”.
10 – Religiosidade. “O nome do meu filho vai ser a primeira coisa que eu ler na Bíblia”. Adivinha como ficou o nome do garoto? Sumário
IT :
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Le commercial est celui qui a promis au client 3 bébés pour dans 3 mois.
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Le chef de projet fonctionnel est celui qui pense qu'on peut faire un bébé en 1 mois avec 9 femmes.
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Le chef de projet technique est celui à qui on donne 3 femmes et 3 mois pour faire 3 bébés.
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Enfin, le développeur est celui qui pense qu'une femme fera un meilleur bébé en 18 mois.
You're getting old!
Do you think time is catching up with you? Perhaps it's already overtaken you and left you in the dust.
Do the years seem to be going ridiculously quickly now? There's a reason for it. You're getting old.
We will provide you a report full of interesting stuff. But first, we need to know who this is for.
Sad Kapteyn,
by Alastair Reynolds
Hello, Earth. It's me again.
I hope you're receiving my signal loud and clear.
You'll be glad to hear that I've warmed up after the long centuries of my interstellar cruise phase. Having run a complete health check, I can confirm that all aspects of me are performing nominally. Better than nominally, if truth be told. At the risk of boastfulness, I'm actually in excellent shape. Propulsion, AI core, long-range sensors and instrumentation, navigation and communication assemblies - I couldn't be in better condition.
Not bad for a piece of space hardware which has already visited six solar systems, without ever needing to return home. Of course, I can't take credit for myself. I was just well manufactured - built to endure for thousands of years.
All the same, thank you for making me.
Onto business, anyway - and I can't begin to tell you what I've found, out here around Kapteyn's star! This really is an extraordinary place - a solar system unlike any that I've already visited. I wish you could be here with me, seeing things through my eyes.
I've dug into my background files and I understand why you sent me to Kapteyn's star. Unlike the other systems I've visited, this sun and its little family of worlds aren't part of the normal family of stars orbiting in the disc and bulge of the galaxy. This is a halo star - a member of a dispersed population of stars and star clusters, enclosing the Milky Way in a great thin sphere. It's entirely possible that these stars were not originally part of our own galaxy, but were torn free of another one after a kind of gravitational collision. And some of these stars are unmeasurably old - more ancient and venerable, perhaps, than any disc stars.
Kapteyn's star is so slow-burning, so settled, that even my instruments can't put an upper limit on its age. It could be nearly as old as the universe.
And its planets?
Just as old.
Make of this what you will - put it down to failing programming if you like - but I feel the age of this place in my bones. All right, my main bus chassis. I don't have bones; I know that. But believe me, this system feels truly time-haunted. The silence and the stillness are almost unbearable, like an endlessly building pressure. Nothing has happened here for entire turns of the galaxy; nothing will happen. Kapteyn's star simmers, eeking out its nuclear lifetime. The dead worlds tick around their dead orbits.
But once, there was something.
I know, I've taken liberties. I should have transmitted my wake-up signal before doing any investigations. But I couldn't resist myself. You made me to be curious.
I found signs of civilisation.
The first planet - Kapteyn b - still lies within the habitable zone of the star, orbiting once every forty eight days. There's nothing living there now, not even an atmosphere, but once there was a technological culture.
Yes, the first I've found. The reason I was made in the first place.
How's that for a discovery?
The fact is, it wasn't hard to detect. Cities cover almost the entire surface of that world. Enormous structures - they must have reached into space! Dishes and towers and the remains of what I think must have been space elevators, climbing all the way to synchronous orbit. A moon, its surface covered by the same kinds of architecture. Evidence of colonisation of the second planet, Kapteyn c, in its much colder orbit.
Wonders beyond comparison, but scoured into a kind of tomblike grey uniformity, after aeons of micrometeorite and cosmic-ray bombardment. Cities as mute as sphinxes.
And nowhere the slightest sign of life.
Continent-sized craters mar Kapteyn b, and I wonder if they speak of some truly awesome catastrophe - a cosmic accident, or something worse? Whatever the case, the builders of these cities are long gone. Perhaps they were dead even before Kapteyn's star was snatched from the clutches of its mother galaxy.
At the risk of inferring too much from too little data, I can't help indulging in a little speculation. I too was the product of a technological civilisation, with the capability to transform a planet, to colonise other moons and worlds, to build daunting structures. The people of Kapteyn b were clearly more advanced than you, my own builders - but given time, you too could have transformed a world in this manner.
Something to think about, isn't it?
Well, that's me signing off for now. I'm going to do some more exploring of this system, and perhaps drop some instrument packages down onto Kapteyn b itself. There'll be a risk in that, since I'll need to come in on quite a tight orbit, and who knows what will happen? Still, that's a hazard I'm prepared to accept. You made me for this, and I'm grateful for all that I've been allowed to see and do.
But look.
I know it's a small thing, and I really shouldn't bother you about it. But it's been quite a long while since I heard from you. I put rather a lot of effort into these transmissions, and it would be good - just once - to know that there was someone at the other end, listening in.
Just a word, to let me know that you still care?Stop Internet...
your brain start to think for itself.
Les Nuls l'Emission c'est ce qu'on a eu de plus proche du SNL en France. Même que si on est honnête on dirait que c'était bien mieux que ce que le SNL pond aujourd'hui. Voilà plus de 20 ans qu'ils se sont arrêtés et pourtant ils sont toujours présents dans la tête et les rires des gens qui ont du goût. petit tour d'horizon des meilleurs sketchs lives du trio comique qui a eu la décence de ne pas se reformer
Here you can watch online all the newest episodes from your favorites series like Prey, Supernatural, The Crazy Ones, In the Flesh, New Girl, Psych, Two and a Half Men, Chicago P.D., NCIS: Naval Criminal Investigative Service, Crisis etc.. without any registration. This website is free of charge, and we only post links to the actual streaming websites that hosts them, we are not the intellectual owners of the videos posted here. If your favorite show is not listed here please contact us and we will find it for you.
Before the ticker tape parades and the inevitable world tour, the triumphant Apollo 11 astronauts were greeted with a more mundane aspect of life on Earth when they splashed down 40 years ago today - going through customs.
Le Java est un langage de programmation orienté lenteur créé par Oracle. Les plus belles prouesses technologiques de ce langage sont Facebook, Wikipédia et Meetic puisqu'ils sont codés en PHP.
Pour information, Java fût accusé en 2003 par Atros d'avoir envoyé en dépression quatre de leurs développeurs qui travaillaient sur un projet Java. En effet, à force de boire du café durant le temps de compilation, les employés étaient sur les nerfs avant de craquer. Heureusement M. Crouton, avocat, utilisa la méthode chewbaccka pour convaincre les jurés que cette histoire n'avait aucun sens.
Coleção de Perguntas de Duplo Sentido (Pegadinhas)
Você está muito engraçadinho... não tem medo de ficar queimado na rodinha?
Quando você esta deprimido(a) você pede um consolo pra alguem ou você vai no psicólogo e se abre pra ele?
Nesse calor ate marinheiro em terra firme na bunda sua...
To precisando de umas coisas lá dos EUA, acho que tudo deve custar uns US$2,00.00 Eu te adianto um Pau e Sessenta. Dá para me ajudar?
Cara, aquele negócio que você tava agitando, num deu pra segurar não... melou
Fiquei sabendo que você gosta de vitamina... Então bate uma com mamão pra mim ?
Continuação: Não quer? Eu preparo uma pra você então, de banana... pica pra você?
Tenho um amigo gay que está vendendo um carro que ele comprou financiado, é so dar o que ele já deu e continuar dando que o carro é seu. Quer?
Cachorro que late n'água, lá te em terra????
Nesse calor vc gosta de uma chuvinha caindo por cima?
Você chegou a poucu de fora?
Fiquei sabendo que você tem um pau aplicado no fundão... a questão é, você vai tirar ou deixar aplicado?
Tenho 5 garrafas de wisky, vc vende 4 e eu te dou uma.
Você esta num barco subindo o rio com seu cachorro paunocu, o barco afunda, vc deixa o paunocu ou leva o paunocu?
Vou até pagar o que eu to te devendo... Amanhã eu deposito um pau na sua poupança.
O que eu te prometi está de pé e vai ser cumprido!
Desculpa se eu te machuquei por dentro.. você sabe que eu sou assim meio cabeçudo
Ooutro dia eu tava em casa morrendo de fome... e resolvi cozinhar um ovo pra comer.
Aí fui até a cozinha, abri a geladeira e peguei um ovo... coloquei ele emcima da mesa e comecei a esquentar a água. De repente, eu ouço um piado "piu piu piu", olho pro ovo e vejo que tem um pinto dentro... Vê se pode... Imagina se eu cozinho com pinto dentro!!"
Versão 2 dessa:
"outro dia eu tava em casa morrendo de fome... e resolvi cozinhar um ovo pra comer.
Aí fui até a cozinha, abri a geladeira e peguei um ovo... coloquei ele emcima da mesa e comecei a esquentar a água. Mas ai fiquei meio na duvida... como ou não como o ovo. E resolvi não comer. Ahhh mas se eu cozinho eu como!!"
Gosta de danoninho?
Você tem dado em casa?
Gosta de verdura?
Você não é como eu, mas eu, so como você...
Caminho de paca tatu caminha dentro ?
Existem 2 índios... 1 sentado na terra e outro sentado no asfalto. Qual deles tem terra na bunda?
Você viu a mangueira entrar nesse carnaval ou estava de costas??